Age ambiguity

[urocyon]

I just ate some cottage cheese, and wished I hadn't; the cold bothered this molar I've been trying to ignore. Yes, it looks like I can't put off going to the dentist much longer, Scary and Bad (and Expensive) as it may be.

Being tired can get me thinking about some slightly odd things--today it's age ambiguity. Besides a few I've run into in person, recently it's seemed that all I've needed to do is stay logged into any IM software with a modicum of basic info available in my profile, and every day new guys with a median age of 21 want to chat me up. This is particularly true of Yahoo, where I set up a subsidiary profile with a photo, partially to see what would happen (I tend to avoid making them public). From the response to this, in particular, I have to wonder about the response to/appeal of age ambiguity.

In my case, this seems to work two ways. I'm one of those people who looks much the same at 28 as at 16, and that perceived age is borderline for being carded buying alcohol. My mother was laughing about this when I went out with Alex, actually. The other is less immediately obvious: I understand that I sound, and sometimes tend to act, younger than I am. This anachronism is probably obvious in conversation. Along with this goes the fact that, due to some unusual circumstances, I was pretty isolated for several years there, and feel almost as if I suddenly came to as a far older person chronologically. (In some ways, it may be extremely appropriate for me to go out with younger people, because our social adjustment might be a better match; I basically missed much of my early 20s.)

I suspect that this touch of ambiguity has been holding some appeal, and it made me wonder about age ambiguity in general. This isn't really something I'd considered much, but it seems to fall within the liminal as well as gender ambiguity or anything else which comes closer to mind. Any thoughts on the matter?

Comments

[alchemi.livejournal.com]

This is not quite on topic, but my impression is anyone female who has a public profile and is on a IM service will be hit on as a matter of routine. This is because horny 12-year olds (and I suspect most are in the 12-16 range, but may say older) have nothing better to do then find out if it is possible to score with a chick you've met online.

In AIM conversation, you came off as mature. Part of that may be using words like 'ambiguity,' 'anachronism,' and 'chronologically.' The problem, IMHO, is that younger folk, even the bright one, tend to use shorter words online, perhaps as a means of keeping up the pace of conversation.

[urocyon-c.livejournal.com]

This is very true, and not just a phenomenon I've noticed on IM services. I recall the days of using a not-so-neutral nick on Undernet and getting all sorts of queries from people who'd apparently done a /who *.vt.edu (before I wised up and started using invisible mode)....I don't even want to think about Efnet without good old +i. Over the years, though, there hasn't really appeared to be much pattern to this, other than the Random German Dudes, sometimes at the rate of five an hour, on ICQ when I briefly marked that I also spoke German; still, they ranged from 14 to 78, with a decent distribution over most of that. For some reason, this seems to have changed over the past year or so, though, without the available information changing drastically. For example, out of the 13 unsolicited messages I've received this week through my usual IM client (and into which I inquired further, frequently out of boredom, I have to say), only two were from someone outside the 20-22 age group--the others were 19 and 48. This seems like a decently representative sample of what I've been getting more recently, and I have no idea why. Posting eyesores again while tired aside. *g*

As for the second part, thank you, but I don't always try. :) To be fair, I can also act as something of a chameleon in that respect, though not to the extent of heavily using textisms. A conversation with someone who can't even spell out the word "you" is painful--save two keystrokes, make someone grind her teeth. In general, I prefer not to sacrifice clarity for the sake of a little speed, and yes, I've also noticed this difference in approach. I also prefer not to come across as pompous, which sometimes happens anyway. ;)